This past Friday, Tyler and I, my parents, and our friends Jared and Kelly, went to a "Celebration of Marriage" seminar at Thanksgiving Point . The topic was "Rekindle the Flame." We paid $50 to go to 2 classes, hear 2 keynote speakers, and have a great dinner and entertainment. I was really glad we went because the seminar was really good. My favorite part was one of the keynote speakers, Richard Paul Evans, who is the author of many NY Times best seller books, like "The Christmas Box" and "The Gift." He is an AMAZING speaker. He talked about how his marriage used to be in major turmoil, and literally on the brink of divorce. He and his wife had agreed that they couldn't live like they had been anymore and that they needed to get the paperwork going. Then it dawned on him, "If so many people love this girl and want to be around her, then I must be such an awful person to bring out the worst in her. How can I improve? Some of the important things that really stood out to me, on what he did to improve his marriage, and that we can do in ours, is to:
1. Ask our spouse each morning when we wake up "What can I do to show you I love you today?" Then, do it! When he did this with his wife, she first rolled her eyes. Then, once she saw he was serious because he was doing it every day, she had a change of heart. She told him that she didn't deserve him. She started changing her ways, and being more compassionate and loving to him. He realized that he couldn't ever change her, but he could change himself, and when he did that, she started to change also.
2. Forgive others and let it go. Don't hold grudges. The person that usually suffers is the one who needs to do the forgiving, not the offender. It puts such a weight on your shoulders when you carry that animosity around. Who needs the extra stress? So, just be the better person and let it go!
3. Think positive things about your spouse. If you focus on the negative, then they will be those negative things. If you focus on the positive, the positive things will come out. And give yourself some quiet time to think those positive things about your spouse each day. It could be in the car, on your way home from work or the grocery store. Your mind is a powerful tool and it can do wonders for your marriage!
Those are just a few things that he talked about. His marriage sounds like it is amazing now...he and his wife have so much love for each other. They are constantly serving each other and always thinking about the other person. I wish you all could have been there to hear him, but I think the few tips I told you about are very important and helpful, which is why I wanted to share them with you!
For those of you in Utah, there is another "Celebration of Marriage" seminar coming up in February. Tyler and I will be there again, so there is an open invitation for anyone that wants to join us!
